Why I Don’t Eat Sauce When You’re Not Having a Feast

For the Jets, There’s No Such Thing as Too Much Sauce (Gardner)

We all have our ideas about how much sauce is too much, and here’s mine. You are either too old to eat sauce, or you’re just too busy to make sauce.

I’m not saying I’m right; I’m just saying whatever I write, I try to be truthful to what I experience.

For example, the first thing that comes to mind to me is that when I was about 10, my sister and I made an entire Thanksgiving dinner without ever touching any sauce at all. All we did was to slice off the top of our baguette sandwiches, dip them in our dipping sauces, and devour them. We never bit into the bread-soaked, cheese-soaked, tomato-soaked, pickle-soaked or pepperoni-soaked parts. We took that first bite to see if it was going to be one of those special bread-soaked, cheese-soaked, tomato-soaked, pickle-soaked, pepperoni-soaked parts that we could never live without. And, it didn’t turn out to be one of them.

But, because my sister had been born three years after me, she ate all the sauce.

I could say she was the one who ate it all, and I’m completely willing to be there for her. But, she ate it all on her own. She didn’t ask for anything, and she certainly didn’t ask to eat the bits that we chose to cut out.

We did enjoy the rest of the meal, of course.

So, what I’m trying to say is, that I’m not saying it’s wrong to eat sauce when you aren’t having a feast.


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